Barney Miller season 8

A beauty contestant's purse is stolen. Wojo is served a paternity lawsuit, then shockingly learns that he's sterile.

A lottery winner threatens the couple who forgot to send his form, while Luger asks Barney to find him a wife. A rift opens between Barney and Harris when Barney orders him to miss a publisher's meeting in order to make a collar.

A car thief confesses to his crime 25 years after he did it. Harris's continuing hostility to Barney actually hides a case of writer's block.

A woman attacks her husband for making her wear tight jeans. Stefan Kopechne from "Werewolf" returns, now claiming to be possessed by a demon.

Dietrich is feared dead when his stress analyzer stops working, while a woman wants the precinct to arrest her husband's alleged mistress.

A burglary at a warehouse exposes the owner as a KGB agent, while a WAC is booked for soliciting.

The precinct is overrun with homeless people during the holidays. Bruno Binder gets arrested for beating a vagrant with a cattle prod.

The two remaining members of a tontine decide that one should die for the other to collect. The detectives arrest a deranged CPR instructor who believes his dummy is real. Levitt brings in three witnesses for Barney to interview for Levitt's medal.

The detectives don uniforms due to a shortage of foot patrolmen, who are out taking the Sgt's exam. They arrest a kosher butcher who claims a news reporter falsely accused him of selling non kosher meat. Luger brutally assaults a purse snatcher.

A clown is mugged, a police recruiter throws a stag party for applicants and a corrections officer released a hundred inmates on Madison Avenue. Levitt is dismayed when the police turn him down for a medal of valor.

A Chinese waiter is reluctant to give information about a gang killing, while Scanlon falls for a rich mugging victim.

Harris and Dietrich continue looking after the uncooperative waiter Mr. Ling, while the mugging victim files a harassment complaint against Scanlon.

A prisoner goes on a hunger strike, while Dietrich doubts that an elderly patient belongs in a mental hospital.

While Luger is unhappy with his mail-order bride, a genius becomes a petty thief and a man is robbed by an old woman.

A man assaults the reporter who printed his obituary, while a thief is caught stealing chickens from a Government warehouse.

As Wojo faces a police board for shooting a thief, an angry parent assaults a nursery-school teacher and a mugging victim becomes a mugger to get out of a pay parking lot.

While Dietrich's old college flame stops by, Deluca returns with an assault charge and a child actor is arrested for attacking his agent.

Harris' enemy Ripner comes back expecting to take the rewards of Harris' latest book, while a woman is mugged in front of the station and a stockbroker is busted for drugs.

A scoutmaster nabs a mugger, while an Amerindian steals his ancestors' bones from a museum. Meanwhile, the precinct is without running water. During the repair effort, Wojo finds an antique rifle that will have a far-reaching effect on the precinct.

The rifle Wojo found in the previous episode is linked to Theodore Roosevelt, meaning that the 12th Precinct may be a landmark -- one that the city decides to sell for a profit. Police business goes on regardless, as a man is robbed at a bank machine, and a former hostage wishes to return to the country that held him captive.

A pair of old ladies are arrested for passing stolen credit cards. Meanwhile, the precinct is sold, and Luger avoids his fiancée.

Friends and felons stop by to say their farewells as the 12th Precinct prepares to close its doors, and the staff gets their reassignment orders.